It’s been kind of busy for me the past few weeks, with henna assignments, workshops, events, weddings and The Ladies Souq. So I’m finally getting around to edit this blog properly and write about The Engagement.
When H and I first broke the news to our parents about, y’know, “Ok kita nak kahwin” end of last year, we set our expectations for the wedding and engagement as low as possible. We still have low expectations for the wedding now, but well, we can’t expect everything to go our way 100%, could we?
We had different views and opinions about how an engagement should be, whether to even have an engagement in the first place or not, and how our engagement should be, if we were to have one. To be frank, if it was totally up to H and I, we think that an engagement is not necessary. *No offence* But we had an engagement ceremony anyway.
But alhamdulillah, it was a very small and simple affair with only the closest family members. To us, the kind of engagement ceremony we had, was “just for the sake of it”. We wanted it to be as simple as possible, with minimal effort and minimal expenditure. I am grateful that my parents and my partner have a common mindset that it is “just an engagement”, and it doesn’t make us any more halal than being “unengaged”. Our status remains the same as long as we are not married.
But as much as we wanted it to be as easy as possible, it was one of the most tiring weekend my parents ever had, especially my mum. One of the main reasons is because, she cooked a full meal for 50 pax all by herself for that day. Of course we helped her with the potong-potong tahu, tempe, sayur and whatnots, but she did the majority of the work. The spring-cleaning was also one of the most thorough spring-cleaning sessions we ever had. Worse than for raya, to be honest. With all the kemas store room, cuci carpet, tukar langsir and whatnots. My mum is such a powerful and wonderful woman!
Besides that, almost everything else was DIY-ed too. Except for the bunga rampai, which was bought. For dulang-wise, my mum made me 2 hampers and decorated the shirts I got for H. The engagement cake was sponsored by an aunt, and a chendol pudding was also gifted by my aunty. Official photographer is my brother. My engagement outfit was one of my kebaya which I wore for raya, and my makeup and hijab-styling was done by yours truly! I was quite nervous about doing makeup for myself, to be honest. Because I tend to screw up sometimes. Like eyeliner senget lah, eye shadow tak equal lah, mascara clumping my eyelashes lah. So I did trial makeup on myself, on my sister and my mum a few times for like the 2-3 weeks leading up the the engagement day. Hahahaha. And I must say, it all paid off! It may not be a professional MUA standard, but it turned out to be one of the best makeup I have ever done in my life and I’m so proud of myself. Yay!
The only people we invited for the engagement were my mum’s siblings, since she is the youngest and has no parents left. I believe H’s parents did the same too, for his side. What happened on that day, oh you know, the guy’s elder relatives come, talk talk, sarungkan cincin, photo-taking, makan, the end. The usual drill and that’s it, we’re engaged. I’m just happy that everything went smoothly. My mum is very lucky to have such loving and helpful siblings who helped to play host with her by serving the food, washing the dishes, packing the left over food and distributing them, etc.
Since H and I both think that an engagement is no big deal to us, we decided to keep it low profile. The only people who knew were our relatives. None of our friends knew we got engaged because we felt that there was no need to tell anyone. Past tense, because most of our friends know about it now. Lol. We didn’t really make much effort to hide it, but it was more like just not announcing it because like I said, it doesn’t really make a difference until we are officially married.
Fast forward to 2 months later, we finally told our mutual friends that we were engaged. The reason we had to break it to them was quite funny. H was planning a surprise birthday celebration for me with our mutual friends and some of our friends actually suggested him to propose to me. They just didn’t know that we were already engaged. Hahahaha. So yeah, that’s how we told them. Sorry guys. 😀