Looking at my calendar, 10 months sounds like it will fly very fast. But at the same time, 300 days feels like it’s still a long time to go. And I have no idea how I am supposed to feel right now. Am I supposed to start panicking now that the number of months left can be counted with 2 hands? Or do I still have time to take it slow and steady to absorb the fact that my life is going to change forever? I have been pretty chillaxed about most of the preparations so far, but at the same time, I am expecting my feelings and mood to evolve as we get closer to D-Day. I am just not sure what exactly to anticipate. Does it even make sense?
Our major wedding vendors have mostly been booked about 2 months ago. I will probably write about our vendors in more details another time. The only thing left for me to think about is berkat, invitation cards, and other nitty gritty stuff like gift trays, sirih dara, bunga rampai and other stationeries. And we still have time to plan for these things. We are currently in the lull period where we don’t really know what to do and prepare. If any BTBs out there have any suggestions on what to do during this period of time, please feel free to share! 🙂
Personal preparation-wise, I have been doing some reflections. This journey has made me question myself about a lot of things for the future. One of the first questions that I asked myself was, what kind of wife would I like to be? And then what kind of mother would I like to be, if and when Allah decides to give us that rezeki and amanah of a child? But other than thinking about the possibilities of my new status as a wife and mother after marriage, I cannot forget the fact that I would still be a daughter and a sister to my parents and siblings. Have I been a good daughter and a good sister? How can I do better in these roles and continue to be a good daughter and sister when I am married with added responsibilities? And have I been a good Muslimah, a good slave to my Creator? With all the time, energy and wealth that He has blessed me with, have I utilised them to the best of my abilities to do good deeds? How have my prayers been? Have I been praying regularly, punctually and with khusyu’? Have I been reading the Quran and making efforts to seek knowledge about His deen?
Sometimes we make so much dua and ask for so many things from Allah. We ask Him to forgive our sins, yet we keep repeating them sometimes. We ask Him to give us His blessings in everything, and for a happy marriage full of barakah. We expect Him to take care of our needs and our lives. But have we been taking good care of our relationship with Him? And have we thanked Him enough for everything that He has given us, especially those that we did not ask for? He is still God without us, but we are nothing without Him.
In every step of our life journey, may we all always have Him in our minds and our hearts. ❤